Romance dinnerware is more than Chinese Food paper cartons and chopsticks. It is more than something contrived out of a magazine. Romantic Dinners and food preparation is the effort you put into making sensual eating unique and memorable. You can go anywhere and get a meal these days, but nothing sets the stage for a romantic tryst like the personal touch of cooking for someone else.
Be Flexible about life throwing you a curve
I once put in a great deal of effort in gathering the necessary ingredients for a meal, for a beautiful Greek woman that I had known for a while, but had never dated. I invited her two weeks in advance to sit down at my table and share a meal with me. We were supposed to meet on a Friday evening but her return flight was delayed by several hours. I didn’t know what had happened because she didn’t call… I thought. But turns out, she did actually try to call me on the airplane, but I had my ringers turned off to focus on cooking and getting my apt ready.
Well, I felt really let down about the whole thing and wasn’t exactly enthusiastic when she showed up at my apartment soaking wet and cold from the sleet storm that had blown across our part of the country. She was making a great effort, and there was something spontaneous about the whole thing. Like the way you feel when someone runs up to you and messes your hair up for a second while they laugh with you! Those little moments that can’t be planned. I didn’t expect her to show up at that hour.
We ate my leftovers sitting on the rug, crossed leg, in front of my fireplace. She took my fork and began to feed me while she told me how much she appreciated me cooking for her. That meant far more to me than candlelight and wine because I could tell that she had a really rough day and there was something so sincere in the things she said. It was the most erotic meal that I had ever shared. Do I really need to go on with this story? Can’t you figure it out!
The point I am trying to make here is, Live and Let Live sometimes! Don’t try so hard to be perfect and have everything so contrived. Be creative, mix and match, put a simple bowl of goldfish on the table, fold your napkins in a funny shape, Write her a series of little love notes that you leave in the bathroom, on the sofa or in an empty wine glass. Creativity is all it takes to plan the perfect evening.
Be unique, But not weird
I met this lady on Facebook and later, halfway through a conversation, learned that she was someone I knew very well. She invited me over to her apartment for dinner. So I go over and find her in the kitchen cooking, and the first thing she says is, “If I had known you grew a beard I would have worn my lucky underwear!” (We had not seen each other in a really long time). So I thought to myself, “Wow, I’m off to a great start!”
Now before I go on any further, I have to tell you that I thought I had eaten just about every kind of food on the planet. Where I live you, can get just anything. I truly love different cultures and the foods they offer. But this meal was a turn off for me. Why?
Okay. First, she took the covers off of several of the dishes and I saw something move in one of the pots(All of the little pots were made of some kind of exotic clay and I actually thought they were romantic.). The meal was designed, as she explained, to be eaten entirely with your left hand, Moroccan style. (You must use the opposite hand that you use for…you know…)
“Okay….I can go for that”…I thought. She reached into one of the pots, scooped out something wet and brown with her bare hand, and slopped it on my plate. I was mortified, but I decided to shrug it off. Then she goes on to clean her hand by licking it. Wow!
I decided not to think and just do it, so I scraped some of the wet food with my left-hand fingers and quickly ate it. I actually liked it. There was something crunchy in it, and I thought it was wild rice. But she later told me that it was ants! I almost threw up! Then she put some African (I think they were African) beetles, that looked a little dazed and half dead on my plate. At this point, I have to tell you, I was looking for the gong… and for the door! My imagination raced ahead to what she had in mind in the bedroom! I quickly shot up from the pillow and said that I had to go and walk my dog. (I don’t have a dog, but I swear the whole thing threw me so bad that I couldn’t think of anything better to say.)
All I can say is. Be Unique…But Not Weird!
Don’t Over Do It.
A six-course meal isn’t necessary and will make the person think that they can never measure up and cook for you. Romance dinnerware can be anything from simple white stoneware to delicate china. You have to think what you want to come across. The key is for your table, and your home, to be inviting and friendly. Not contrived and plastic. A romantic dinner is not a marathon designed to trap somebody into liking you. It is saying, “This is who I am…this is where I live…I am inviting you in…for a while…let’s enjoy each other over a meal.”
And I know it sounds strange, but my girlfriend Marisa, who is a fabulous cook and party planner invited a guy to her house to eat and he left after he told her that he didn’t think that he could ever measure up to her, intimately, and that he felt that her overall expectations of him were too much for him. I felt sorry for her, but I know that she way overdid it. When you put on a big production, it can backfire on you. It’s best to keep it simple. After all, the meal isn’t the only thing that you had in mind… Is it?”
Leave the clean up till later
I am kind of a neat freak. I love order. I hate a wrecked place. But when a woman comes to my house, they are my priority. Not the dishes, not emptying the dishwasher, not doing laundry, not tidying up. When I have someone over to eat, I put the dishes in the sink and leave them for later…whenever that is. I want them to know that I am glad that they took time out to come and see me and that my usual routine is tossed out of the window in favor of catering to them.
Don’t you just hate going to a party and the hostess is cleaning up around you while the party is going on? It makes you feel like you should just leave and not mess up anymore. You feel almost guilty of using another glass when you see them slaving in the kitchen, cleaning up. The same is especially true when you have a one-on-one dinner. Don’t make the person feel guilty for asking for a little more wine or a cup of coffee. Don’t act like some kind of martyr or you will most likely never see them again!
And whatever you do, don’t let them clean up for you. Instead, take them by hand and take them to your sofa. Bring out a small tray of some kind of exquisite dessert and politely say, “I just wanted to give you a taste of my desserts. I have more than what’s on this tray.” (I literally had a girl say, “Well, I want what’s NOT on the tray” as she pulled me on the sofa. I remember her laughing when I blushed over her bold enthusiasm.)
Let their imagination take over! Saying that is enough icing on the cake! Give them the icing…but reserve the cake! And remember, too much sugar makes one sick!
Show good manners
Don’t talk with your mouth full, eat slowly, use your napkin, don’t be a pig, say excuse me if you accidentally burp, don’t reach across the table for the salt and pepper (ask for it), bring a bottle of wine, or flowers for the table (or a box of chocolates), turn off your cell phone, put the seat down in the bathroom, carefully wrap any personal products (such as condoms) to conceal them before you lay them in their bathroom wastebasket…
In other words, be civil, gracious, kind and mannerly and you she might just stick around for dessert. Otherwise, you will find yourself standing alone in your dining room, wondering what happened to cut your night short.
Mail a thank you note the next day expressing your appreciation again. This can be a simple handwritten note, or a little thank you card. Everything that you send out comes back to you.
Don’t forget to casually ask about any special diet needs or food dislikes before the dinner date. My sister hates chicken. I don’t know why, but her boyfriend knows not to take her to a chicken place. Some people are vegans, and some are meat lovers. “Well, is there anything that you really don’t like or shouldn’t eat?” How hard is that to ask?