Don’t you think it’s ironical how girls are always complaining that perfect gentlemen no longer exist, while they are the same confused damsels who will readily dump you for a 29-year old fuck boy who lives with his mom and never shaves his balls, just because he’s got ‘swag’? I don’t mean to be rude but, it really bothers me that sagging torn pants and weird tattoos are classier these days than suits and ties; well, for most girls to say the least. Truth is, the sweeter you act around teenage girls today, the slimmer your chances are of getting past a mere conversation with any of them.

I’ll be real with you for a moment. I was once a good boy (I still think I am, just a little smarter now), and being a Virgo, it really came naturally. I believed in treating women with respect and offering a shoulder to cry on every damn time. This meant faking a smile as I watched my crush get destroyed by her ‘boyfriend’. Being a nice guy means swallowing all the pain and being nothing more than a friend, while you desperately hope that one day she will notice your efforts and perhaps see you differently. But soon enough, you realize that that day will never come, and to her, you will never be anything more than the friend she only remembers when she’s down. Your social role in life will always be fixing hearts you didn’t break. And that sucks!

See 15 Types of Girls Every Guy is Sick of Dating

So at what point do you draw a line between being a good boy and a pushover? This is a tricky question that most guys have no answer to. You want to be the sweet guy who every girl desires, but you also want to be cool and contemporary. Well, there are several ways you can hit the two birds with one stone. But first, let’s look deeper into why most girls will not hesitate to dump your faithful ass for playboys, even though they already know that their hearts will be broken, eventually.

You are always available

Perhaps the biggest problem and probably the number one reason for being taken for granted by women is that you’re always available. Good boys hardly realize that they are sacrificing too much with very little returns. Of course, I’m not saying that you should be there for her only if she has something to offer in return; Lord knows that’s a dick move. But c’mon. If you’re always spending all your money on buying her gifts and sending her airtime so she can call her friends and plan parties you’re never even invited to, can’t you just read the bold label that to her you’re just a tool? Girls hate men who come off as too needy. They may not always realize it, but they really do. As a man, knowing when to offer your help and when to let her handle her own shit is important. Otherwise, you’re just pushing yourself into the friend zone, slowly and intuitively.

Read How to get out of the Friendzone Like a Boss

Bad boys, on the other hand, know how to overlook women. They may not realize it either. Hell, they may not even do it with the best intentions at heart. But eventually, women mistake their distance for personal space and so, at the end of the day, everything works out perfectly for them. A bad boy will rarely call his girl unless he wants something, neither will he ever allow himself to stay vulnerable to exploitation. He knows what he wants and he stands for what he believes in. Women love guys with a stance. So while bad boys continue to get all the guys, you will always find yourself stuck in the friend zone, with your cute susceptible heart.

You’re too clingy and you say yes to everything

Ok, being clingy is cute. But you don’t want to overdo it if you want her to like you. Being too clingy puts funny ideas into her head. To start with, she’ll believe that she is the only important thing in your life, and whether this is true or not, it’s will not look good on your side. Once she starts to think of herself as a VIP in your life, the road gets steeper for you. The mistreatment, exploitation, and manipulation will only grow worse. She puts you in a zone, a depressing zone because she’s almost certain that no matter what happens, you will always be around for her satisfaction. Again, saying yes to her demands always proves that you have no will, other than pleasing her.

Judging the Bad Boys

They may be assholes, but it’s not your job to sneer at them. If you’re constantly judging the bad boys for being cold on these girls, you’re doing everything wrong. Let’s face it. The only reason you criticize their ill behavior is to make yourself feel better. Deep down, you wish you had the power to command women like they do. Deep deep down, you wish you were in their shoes. Ignorance comes in handy here. Whether she gets abused in her relationship or not, it’s simply none of your business. Instead, concentrate on doing good by her, on your own terms, not picking holes in other guys’ behavior just so she can see you as the better match.

What Makes Men Cry? These 15 Personal Stories Show that Men are Just as Emotional as Women

Now that we have that out of the way, how do you get her to like you without being exactly insolent? Well, you’ve probably heard this before but, you need to learn to be yourself. Get a goal. Get a dream. It’s only then that you’ll have a purpose. And once you have a purpose, you spend way less time crushing on immature girls and instead, focus on developing yourself. You become a master of action and rarely have time to judge other people. You cease to beat yourself because now, you hardly compare yourself to other guys. Your life naturally starts to brighten up and you realize that you’re actually more fun to be with than you thought.

With a clear destination, women become just another branch on your life’s tree, and we all know that unnecessary branches can be cut off. Soon enough, you gain your courage back and talking to women becomes just another mere luxury you can afford. It’s now time to mark your boundaries. Ever heard the famous adage, “You attract who you are”? You suddenly start to draw your own kind to yourself. Let the right girls pull towards you, naturally. Don’t force girls who don’t want to be in your life, to be in it. They are just not worth the effort. Learn to keep some distance too.

Girls appreciate some personal space every now and then. Stay clear with your intentions to love, but avoid looking desperate at all costs. Above everything else, don’t force yourself to look or sound ‘cool’. You can’t change who you are. If you’re a good boy, then be the best at it. Eventually, the splendid girls, who actually like you for who you are, will show up, and this time, they will be more than willing to stay, with or without the benefits. So stay real with yourself.

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